Violet
by Cieltsuki
Summary: ZeroxYuuki fic, takes place just after Vampire Knight Guilty, mostly just about Yuuki and Zero coming back together after being away for a year. T just to be safe, probably some smooching later.
1. Red Violets

**Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight, or its characters…or anything really! I don't even really own that much of this I don't think… I mean I'm using someone else's characters…so I don't really own that much right? Bah whatever. I DON'T CLAIM TO OWN ANYTHING!**

NOTE: I've read the manga up until chapter 63 (the most recent one at this time) so if you haven't…there might be **a few** minor **spoilers**! However, if you watched all of the anime, (I did that too!) then you shouldn't really have any issues.

Violet… When I was a kid, I always used to love violets… purple has always been one of my favorite colors. Although, I began to like it even more 6 years ago.(1) It used to be just a color…but now it's half of what I think about. Those eyes…Those strange purple eyes that, a few times, became tainted. Tainted with blood and glowing that terrifying color… I remember the feeling as his fangs sharply dug into me…

My eyes snap open. I'm panting. Kaname-senpai…no…just Kaname now. We've been lovers for about a year now…but why can't I just call him by his name? I've finally started using Onii-sama…but still… Anyways, **Kaname** will be home later today. I should really stop thinking about Zero. I mean, to have dreams that he's sinking his fangs into my neck again…I…it's cruel. To Oniisama. To Zero. To me…but I deserve it. I don't deserve Kaname, but he's willing to die for me. I certainly don't deserve Zero…but I think…I think he might love me…just maybe. Wishful thinking? Yeah. It probably is. But maybe…just maybe.

Pain. I grip my neck. It hurts! I want…I want Oniisama here. Don't I? I desire his blood. But even after I drink it…I still crave more. Zero's. I need him, I want… I want what I can't have. I want what I don't deserve. I've caused him so much pain. And Oniisama knows! I told him…but he said that it's okay! But it's not! Nothing will ever be okay, I just keep hurting and hurting him. I want to leave him, but I don't want to ever let him go. I want his brown hair…his copper eyes. I do, I really do love him! I desire him… his blood… A shudder passes through me at the mere thought…no the privilege of sucking his blood…feeling it flowing down my throat…so warm and-

No! I turn over, putting a pillow over my head and nearly suffocating myself. My throat hurts so much! It's in flames now, engulfing me…dragging me down…I need…Zero. The only one who can stop it. But…Onii-Sama. I need him too…He alleviates it. I need them both. But I deserve neither. Zero…those violet eyes. Those eyes that I've always wanted to help, those eyes I've always cared for. Those eyes I've always wanted to keep locked with mine…Those eyes that I just want to capture, to entrance. If only I wasn't a vampire. Maybe then Zero would love me. But I guess even when I wasn't a vampire, **he** felt like he didn't deserve me. I scoff as I grip my throat tighter, panting as I do so. Partially because I'm strangling myself, and partly because the thirst it slowly driving me towards insanity. He was so foolish. Blindly devoted to me as I hurt him again and again with my words and actions. All because he thought that **I **was the victim…Just because he drank my blood and we both didn't know…that **I** was the vampire. The true monster. Me. Not him, everything was just so backwards.

He drank my blood…It's so hard to keep those memories at bay. At the time, it didn't mean nearly as much as it did now. But…just the thought of his fangs…Piercing me as he slowly sucks my blood…the feeling of his mouth against my neck. I shudder, clenching my eyes shut and tightening my grip around my neck even more, to the point that I really couldn't breathe. For some reason, it takes me a moment to register that I can't breathe and that I'm gagging because of it. Oops. I finally release my vise grip around my neck and roll over, tearing the pillow from my head and gasping desperately for air. Of course, my thirst only makes it worse. And I can still feel the ghost of Zero's lips on my neck. Taking my blood again. I shudder and wrap my arms around myself, my nails cutting into my skin.

"Zero…" I whisper to myself. I sit up and shake my head furiously. I have to stop this. If I continue to torture myself like this, surely Onii-Sama will find out. He would probably suffer over this, which is the last thing I want. I take a few deep breathes and the deranged thirst becomes almost bearable. I look around furiously for some blood tablets, and when I finally find them, I dump a handful of them in my mouth. As always, my thirst is never fully quenched. The tablets only allow me to be sane, but they don't come anywhere near as close as drinking Onii-Sama's blood does…I freeze. I really should stop thinking about that… I shake my head madly again and go out of my room, maybe talking to Aidou(2) will help calm me down. Just as I'm about to open my mouth to call for him, he comes out of no where.

"Cross Yu- ah, I'm sorry. Yuuki-Sama." He looks down and bows his head just a bit, which makes me frown. I don't like that he seems to be almost scared of what I would do to him if he doesn't call me 'Yuuki-Sama' it's just so weird. "I was wondering when you were going to come out. Are you okay?" He asks me, looking genuinely concerned.

"Ah no I'm fine. I was just tired that's all…did you need me for something?"

"No, I just don't really have anything to do I guess…And Kaname-Sama asked me to look after you…" he trails off. Okay so he's just bored. Well so am I so that's just fine by me, as long as he can think of something to do. It was a bit tiring to just lay around the house all day…and by tiring I of course mean incredibly boring. I'm not in any place to complain though, Onii-Sama wants me to stay inside for my own safety and I owe it to him to do what he asks whenever possible.

"I don't have anything to do either…I'm really bored actually." I look at him, silently begging for him to think of **something** to do. I need to get my mind off of Zero. Zero… NO. Now is not the time for that.

But no. Aidou Hanabusa merely shrugs in boredom. Great.

"Ummm. Oh I know! I don't really know very much about vampire history and etiquette and stuff, plus Onii-Sama said you should teach me, so why don't we do that?" I smile at him, even if it's just studying, it would help be a distraction. He nods. He really is just so faithful…even though I'm pretty sure Onii-Sama never asked him to be, Aidou has always just been his servant, doing whatever he asked with no, or very few, questions asked.

"Yes well all the books are just over here in this room and there's a table and chairs we could sit at…" He trails off, looking at me questioningly. I nod and let him lead the way. Even though studying isn't really the most exciting thing, it's definitely better than wrestling with my unending thirst. Plus, it **is **kind of interesting, learning about the history of vampires.

(1)- 4 years before they went to Cross Academy, then I'm just guessing that it's about a year before she turned into a vampire, then she's been a vampire for about a year…so basically it's just when she first saw Zero, but put less bluntly.

(2)- I think it can be spelled either Aidou or Aido, but I like Aidou better because for some reason it's cuter to me. I guess it could be "Idol" but whatever. Oh and I didn't add the –senpai because she's not going to school anymore so…

Yayy my first Vampire Knight fic! Hopefully I'll end up finishing it…Man I love this anime SOOO MUUCH! Well the Manga too obviously…Anyways, please review and tell me what you think! If anyone wants to be a beta I don't have one, or if anyone wants one I'd love to be one! I notice things in other people's stories way more than I notice them in mine…hmmm. Anyways **PLEASE REVIEW**! Tell me what you think! It's going to be a ZeroxYuuki fic by the way so…yeah. It's set during the year that Kaname and Yuuki are vampires together, and yes I use the Japanese Honorifics. If you need help, look of 'japanese honorifics' on wikipedia. I'm pretty sure that it has all the ones that will be used here, if there is one you don't know feel free to ask and I'd be happy to tell you! I know way more than necessary! Again, any review is appreciated, no matter how lame in short (although long and insightful ones are always better) So if you like it please favorite and/or simply review and say that you do! It takes about 10-20 seconds if you don't want to write a long one! 5 reviews at least would be reaaaly nice! I don't think that will happen, but I can hope right? Oh, and I have a bit of a tendency to mix up past and present…I usually type in past but then I wrote a portion of this in present so I tried to change it to present…anyways if you notice something off please tell me!


	2. Searching

I can't take this anymore.

I need to see him…I need to see Zero. I'm always so bored…which doesn't turn out well. When I'm bored, I'm usually alone. And when I'm alone, I don't have anything to distract myself from Zero.

I…need him. I just can't do this. Not anymore. So I'm just going to find him. No matter how long I have to keep on searching…I'll find him. I have to. If he doesn't want me, well that's fine too. I'll just let him kill me. Whatever he wants- it's all him.

_Everything…Everything is __**you**__ now Zero._

I'm ready now, I've decided. Even if it means leaving Kaname behind. My heart aches at the thought. It took a long time for me to decide who…but I've chosen. Kaname has always been in the shadows, helping me form behind the scenes. But…he's still like a brother to me. What I worry about most is what he said that day…I can't get it out of my head.

"_Yuuki…If you ever want to leave- I won't stand in your way."_

"…"

"_And…if you want me to die, I want it to be by __**your **__hands."_

"_What? What are you talking about? How could I…Why would I want something like that! Tha-"_

_He gives a bittersweet smile. As his hyacinth breath caresses my face, I see the sorrow in his eyes, the miserable upturn of his 'smile'. No, it's not a smile. If you pay it no mind- then perhaps you'll mistake it for one-but you would be a fool say it was a smile. Love shines in his eyes though…so maybe it __**could**__ be taken as one._

"_Yuuki…if you ever leave me…" He pauses, still staring at me. He sighs softly, and I close my eyes, breathing in his scent. Hyacinth. How bizarre…it must be a vampire thing, because last time I checked, people don't just smell like flowers_

"_I will die." My heart thumps, and I widen my eyes._

"_That's…not right. You can live just fine without me! I-"_

"_No Yuuki. I will die."_

I close my eyes, shaking my head and sighing. I have to leave though. He loves me…loves me so much. I can tell. So I'm sure it breaks his heart to see that I don't truly want to be with him.

I **am** killing him. Just slowly…slowly. Torturing him bit by bit. Slicing him open with my knife gently, dragging it across his skin.

At least this way…I'll just be plunging it into his heart, shredding it with maddening glee. Over. It will all be over for him, but at least he won't have to wonder. He won't have to worry.

It's for the better, isn't it? No, that's not important. Even if I just assume that it **is** better for him, that's not why I'm doing this. It's because I'm selfish. Doing this all for myself. But I have to do, truly I feel like I will die. Now I truly understand what Kaname meant that time. But at least in my case, if I get denied, he will kill me. He promised…He promised! He has to!

I can't wait…until he kills me. That moment when his eyes are trained on me… oh god. My throat burns and I have to stop running because I'm gasping for air. _It will…all be…over soon._ I content myself with that thought and continue running through the forest. The first place I'm going to go is Cross Academy. Hopefully, he'll be there. And if he isn't…well I'll get to see the Chairmen again. To be honest I've kind of missed him.

I sigh sadly as I think about it…then I replay my previous thoughts in my head and my eyes widen. _I can't wait…until he kills me._ I really…am going crazy. For Zero. Only for Zero. I really would do anything for him. If he told me to sit and wait for him, I would never leave. As the years passed and I had already accepted that he didn't want me- he was never coming back- I would still stay. Just because he wanted me to.

_Anything…anything for you Zero._ I smile that bitter smile, that same one that Kaname had that one day, and hope. I want Zero to accept me, and if he doesn't, then I want…no, I **need** him to kill me. If he doesn't- then I'll try to get some other vampire hunter to do it. Because…

I can't take this anymore.

I rest for the night and after a few more days of this, this endless walking/running/wishing I finally reach the academy. And standing at the fountain is…Zero. My eyes widen and he turns around. His eyes meet mine, and in a split instant he whips the Bloody Rose out.

_So…this is how it's going to be huh? That's…oh god. It just __**hurts so much.**__ But if this is what Zero wants…then I must let him. _

My throat feels like Satan himself lit it on fire. I gasp, collapsing on the ground, my eyes glowing red. I guess I had been thinking too much of myself when I thought that I could keep from drinking Zero's blood but…at this rate I'm not so sure. My breathing comes out as ragged pants and my fingers claw at the ground.

"Yuuki."

I don't look up, because I don't want him to see. These glowing red eyes…truly those of a demon. Human…I'm not human. My heart quivers at this and I hear footsteps.

"Why are you here Yuuki?" He asks, calmly and evenly. His gun gently presses against my head and I finally look up. His violet eyes bore into my heated red ones.

Those violet eyes…

-Sorry it took so long for a new chapter! I've had lots of test recently, and then I have a huge choir contest tomorrow, so I decided to write to take my mind off of it.

Anyways, hopefully the next chapter will come out sooner than this one!

Btw, I don't plan for this to be something ultra long that really is just getting drug out and gets boring. Depending on how long they are, probably only 2-4 more chapters!

Please Review, and thank you for reading!


	3. Reunited and it Feels

Oh look at you, you get to see P.O.V. switching in this chapter! I can tell you're excited :**D Sorry for taking so long to update**, I've got another huge choir thing in a few weeks, so I've been practicing for that. And I'm learning to play guitar now so…yeah. Plus my math teacher is awful so I have to figure out everything on my own. Joy. Well, here's your update! **Please review! Even if you read this like a year after I wrote it, I won't think it's weird. :)**

Am I the only one who worries about that? I always think the author will think I'm crazy for reviewing something a year after they posted it…Whatever. If you find any grammar mistakes or can't figure out what I was trying to say, please tell me! I don't always edit my stuff very thoroughly… O.o

**DISCLAMER: I DON'T OWN OR CLAIM TO OWN ANYTHING!**

**-**AUTHOR**-**

Alright, so first, we're going to rewind things a bit, and look into Zero…

-ZERO'S P.O.V-

Yuuki…Damn it. Why the hell won't you leave me alone? You're not even here! And yet…still…

I shake my head, dispelling thoughts of **her.** Or, at least, **try** to. It doesn't work very well. All those times…all those moments. She was right there, but I pushed her away. Held myself away from her, fearing she would realize that **I** was a monster.

Ironic, isn't it?

**Now** who's the monster?

**Now** who's the one afraid to show their face?

**Now **look who can't be trusted.

You.

You were the monster, the demon the whole time. I spent so much time shattering myself within the darkness, and it was all for naught. None of it mattered. All that effort and time put into keeping you alive, safe, happy, **human**. It was worthless.

Keeping you alive? Well I'm the one who's going to end you.

Keeping you safe and happy? I'm not there to do that, you decided that **Kaname** would take care of that, didn't you?

Keeping you human? …there are no words. Nothing for this.

Did I fail? Or was I doomed from the start? I guess I really **am** just a pawn…But whose? Am I yours, or am I Kaname's?

I give out a bitter laugh, as I begin walking to class. After everything that happened, I just came back. Ready to live out monotony. But now…what's this I'm hearing? 'Yuuki is back' they say?

Why does it hurt so much, yet feel so amazing at the same time? I…I don't understand.

-Author-

All right then, let's take it back to the present.

-Zero's P.O.V.-

I see her on the ground, gasping for air as if she's dying. Her fingers are scraping the grown uselessly, and her face is covered by her long tresses. I take a deep breath, gulping. _Here we go…It's all over now._

"Yuuki." I call to her, my voice calm and level. She doesn't look up. Hiding yourself, even when you know the truth…I know the feeling. But a demon such as you cannot be allowed to exist. And I never break a promise.

"Why are you here Yuuki?" It sounds more like a statement than a question. I take steps towards her, my heart pounding all the while. I can barely keep my breathing even, and I feel like it's a death march.

I press my gun, the Bloody Rose, against her head…_gently. _Far too gently. I stare intently down at her, wishing I could read her thoughts. After a few moments, finally, _finally_, she looks up. I can't breathe. I can't think. Her gleaming rose-colored eyes that reflect all her pain, sorrow, and _hunger_ seem to bore into my soul.

There are no words for this.

-Yuuki's P.O.V.-

The longer I stare into those eyes, the more I want to look away. I want to go back…not to Kaname though…That's the one thing that I can't do. I want to go back to before I was a…vampire. Yes, that's what I am. There is nothing that I can do to change this. But I can't bear to look into those blue tinted red eyes of his.(1) So I cower away, I look down. I can't even speak, and all I can think about is Zero, and his gun lightly pressing against my skull.

After a moment of tense silence, he speaks in an emotionless tone. "Well?" The gun pushes harder, to the point where it becomes a little uncomfortable.

His question…what was his question? Why am I here? Because…Because I need you Zero. I can't do this anymore. I need you, even if you kill me…Well at least I'll know that I died by your hands.

"…I can't do this anymore." I look back up at him, my demon eyes making contact with his.

-Zero's P.O.V.-

Her eyes stab me as if they were the devil's pitchforks. A demon, a vampire, that's all she is. But…aren't I being a bit hypocritical? Doesn't this mean…I'm a demon too? Yes, I established that years ago. I'm the demon hunter from hell. Ironic, isn't it?

Irony…everything seems ironic to me. Everything seems bittersweet. But…this is Yuuki. And…she…needs me. Doesn't she? If she didn't, then she wouldn't be looking at me with such hunger in her eyes…

"Why…are your eyes glowing so much." I narrow my eyes, trying to intimidate her into telling the truth.

"I…Because…" she sighs, looking down again, then takes a deep breath. "Because I need you. Kaname's blood…just doesn't satisfy me." She refuses to look at me.

…She drank Kaname's blood. She tried to replace me with him. Never mind that it didn't work, she thought that I could be replaced? And of all people…by** Kaname.**

Without realizing it, I'd knocked her over, with me laying on top of her. One hand was around her throat in a death grip, the other was pushing the gun into her head. She gasped, wincing from the pressure on her head. Her eyes seemed to grow more red and she just looked at me, mouth agape.

_This is it. The end._ I glare at her as harshly as ever, and start to pull the trigger.

(2)

-Yuuki's P.O.V.-

It hurts. It hurts a lot. Not just my throat, which was already on fire, but now has the added pain of feeling like its being crushed. Not just the gun smashing itself into my skull. No, those things only make it worse. Zero…he really hates me. That glare…if I wasn't about to die, I would never be able to get it out of my head. Such hatred, isn't it my fault? It is all because of **me** that Zero knows what such hate feels like? Probably.

But then, my eyes start to glow even more, and I feel a great power within me.

_What?_

I can't even control it. And the bloodlust grows, until it's all I can think about. All coherent thought leaves me.

Blood. There it is. The only blood I need. So now, I must take it.

-Zero's P.O.V.-

A feral, wicked, grim look marches it's way onto Yuuki's face. And before I know it, my gun is gone. Now, **I'm **the one on my back, with Yuuki on top of me. The look on her face…it's as if she's all instinct. A lot like those level E vampires, but a little different. She's so animalistically focused on me, that my breath catches in my throat. My heart beats faster, and then my breath starts to become shaky and…frightened. I'm scared of Yuuki.

"Yuuki, get off of me." I try to sound calm and forceful, but it doesn't come out that way. Instead, it sounds shaky.

It's like I didn't say anything. She presses her lips to my neck, and I stiffen.

"Y-Yuuki…what? Get…Get. Off." I try to sound as angry at possible, and begin to struggle. But she's much too strong.

She slowly licks up from my collarbone to the corner of my jaw. I shudder and give an intake of breath. It feels…good. It's so bad, but it feels wonderful at the same time. Is this how Yuuki felt when I used to drink her blood?

Drink. Her. Blood.

Just the thought, the memory of it, makes my eyes flash red. They glow brightly as I watch her press her lips to my neck again. I swallow in anticipation, she opens her mouth, curls her lips back, and touches her fangs to my neck. Just as she is about to sink her teeth in, her eyes widen and she jumps back.

I am barely able to suppress a groan of disappointment.

-Yuuki's P.O.V.-

I bolt upright just in time. I couldn't stop myself, I couldn't control myself… I cover my mouth with my hands and look into Zero's now red eyes with my own.

"…Zero…" I stare at him in horror. "Oh my God…Zero…I'm…I'm so sorry! I…" I look down, and begin to get off of him. But his hand reaches out to stop me. I slowly turn back to him and tilt my head to the side in confusion. His eyes that now glow almost as bright as mine just make it harder. The bloodlust bubbles to the surface and I gasp, trying to keep it from taking over.

"If a vampire takes blood without asking, they are subject to death." he tells me, but I already know this. So why…? I swallow nervously, still trying to keep myself from jumping him and sucking out his very life.

"However, you are already sentenced to death by my hand, aren't you?" An almost feral tone creeps into his voice. I stare at him warily.

"I however, am not. We aren't even, now are we?" He pulls me close and I feel his breath on my neck. My eyes are wide and I can't help but shudder. Is he **trying** to torture me? Because if he is, he's doing an amazing job of it. He touches his lips to my neck, and I begin to tremble.

And then, before I can say anything, he bites down.

Author Notes

(1)-They're purple. I don't know if that was confusing but…they're purple right there.

(2)- I almost ended it there, but I didn't because it might take me a while to update, and I don't want to leave a cliffhanger…

Thanks for reading! **Please Review! :D**


	4. When things start to get too Poetic

Maybe I should just stop apoligizing for taking so long to update...We all know I take forever. Sorry! Yeah...It's been almost **2 months** since my last update...Oops. I've gotten into other things, not huge into vampire knight but I want to finish this... So I will. Which is also why I don't really plan on making this too long...so that I actually have a chance to finish it. I have no idea how I want it to end or anything so...IDEK what's going to be happening. I tend to just write and whatever happens happens...I'm just got a live journal recently, so I'll have stuff that isn't really **fanfiction** on there. My livejournal account is under the same name as this (cieltsuki) I don't have many friends yet, so if you have one feel free to friend me!

So as always... **Disclaimer: Don't own, Don't sue please!**

Again, **sorry for not updating!** Not really much of an excuse there. **Please R&R.**

-Yuuki's P.O.V.-

_And then, before I can say anything; he bites down._

I gasp, my head tilting back and I hear a moan. It takes me far too long to realize that it was **me**.

"Z-Zero!" I can barely manage to choke it out. "What...What are you..."

He slowly sucks the blood out, and I can feel it. Feel his **teeth** pressing into my skin. Feel their sharpness gently pressing through. Feel is **lips** softly curving around the wounded area. Feel his **breath** paint the skin with rasping strokes. He hmms and and I feel the vibrations, just barely, fluttering against my flesh.

The air in my lungs is crashing out of my throat in loud bursts, and I tilt my head a little more for him. One of his hands reaches out to cup the back of my neck and the other shifts a little to wrap around my waist. My eyes close and he just just swallows more, keeps pulling the blood out.

"**Zero...**" I just barely whisper, voice plainly showing my ecstasy.

He gently slides his teeth out of my neck, and turns me around to face him. His now violet eyes are half lidded. He looks at me for a long moment, and then gently slicks his tongue around his mouth to capture the blood currently leaking out the side of his mouth, on his lips.

"Now...Now we're even. Now we're both liable for death."

"...Why...Why did you...?" I stammer, confused. But he just smiles softly.

"Yuuki..." He presses me against his body, holds me tighter, but somehow still with an odd tenderness to it.

-Zero's P.O.V-

I pull her close, I've missed her. Damn it. She's supposed to be dead. I'm not supposed to **care**. And I wasn't supposed to drink her blood. _Damn it_. Damn it **damn** it **DAMN it**! Her breath is fluttering against my chest and...Last time I checked I didn't think things fluttered. Butterflies always smacked their wings through the air, and leaves just kind of flapped around in the wind. There was no _fluttering_ involved.

So _why. Why_ did I miss her so much? _Why _do I just want to hold her close?_ Why_ do I have to **care **so much? And when the _fuck_ did I start thinking like some kind of poet? _Why_ did she have to come back? Come back and ruin everything, turn me into some kind of feather-hearted _vampire._

"You tried to replace me with Kaname." I state, trying to regain my anger. I let go of her and press her into the ground, climbing on top.

She just looks at me, eyes undecipherable, and replies calmly. "You just sucked my **blood** Zero. Again. And I never gave you permission. Why did you do that?"

I stare at her intently for a few minutes, then slowly lean back, removing some of my weight from her.

"You really want to know why?"

Her eyes narrow, but a flicker of nervousness burns through. "Yes. I do actually."

I stay silent for a long moment. "...Because I'm...I'm sick of trying to kill you Yuuki. Always. We're always fighting and obsessing now. We can't keep doing this. Trying to destroy each other...This isn't going to **do **anything."

"And what does this solve? Zero. So we've both got a bounty on our heads. So what?"

"...We can... be together..." I just whisper out, not really meaning to say anything, but realizing too late that I **did** say it out loud. Shit.

-Yuuki's P.O.V.-

My heart pounds in my chest. Together? Is that what he wants...I want...I want him. **So much**. Anything. I would do **anything** for Zero. I always have haven't I? Given up my blood as a human, trying to comfort him as best as I can. I...I need him. I need his blood. I need his love. If he won't love me, then I have to die. But if he does...

I swallow loudly and he refuses to look at me. "Zero..."

He climbs off and sits with his legs stretched out beside me. I sit up, wincing a little and try to look him in the eyes.

"Zero...this isn't working. We aren't saying what we really feel...what we really mean. I want...I want to tell you everything. I want us to be direct with eachother..." He slowly looks up as I talk, but I turn my gaze down to the hard cold floor beneath me.

"I...I want you Zero. Not just as my friend. But...I want your...blood." A part of my shudders a bit and throat smolders. "And you. I want you to love me. I **need** you to love me. If you can't do that... I just...I can't **do **this anymore Zero!" I flash my gaze up to his wide, glowing eyes.

"Love you? You want me to...love you...?" His voice shapes the word _love_ like it's something...well...lovely. Like those violets, fragile flakes gently clasping a small bud. Gently. Delicately.

"Yes...I...I **love** you Zero." I close me eyes, refuse to look at him. "And I **need** you. Just...tell me what's going to happen. I need to know. What are you going to do." I pause to take in a shuddering breath. "Kill me? Kiss me? Make up your mind? I need to know Zero...Because I just can't do this anymore."


	5. This chapter is too short

he he...so it's been about 3 months...oops. Well...Here's the next update. I haven't been in the Vampire Knight fandom for a while, which is why it's taking me so long. And I didn't really plan out how I wanted the story to end *is dumb* This is basically shameless, plot-less, romance. Kind of like Twilight. Except I don't get paid. And Twilight isn't really "romance". It's just delusional. So anyways...

**Disclaimer: I don't own Vampire Knight, or its characters**

Silence. And not just any silence, mind you. Silence where you're scared to breathe, for fear that the world will fix you with the sharpest glare for breaking its serenity. Silence where you're scared to move, because you're worried it will shatter it. Silence where you can feel the slightest breeze, the charged energy permeating the air, and where you get an adrenaline rush just from the stillness. Silence.

-Zero's P.O.V.-

She wants me. I want her. What more is there to it really? It sounds so simple. So why does it feel so complicated? What is it about us, where we can both know everything, know all ulterior motives, know masked feeling that we fear to express...? Yet here we are. Getting next to nowhere and dancing around words and hiding behind hormones and ephemeral glances.

It's so simple really, just ignore the past. Ignore all the pain, all the lying for each other's sake (ridiculous), ignore all the wrong and focus on solely the good._ But we're meant for each other!_ It's all so cheerful, on the outside.

"Zero..." She whispers, shyly. Sounding scared, hurt, and uncertain. And that's when it hits me(1), she feels just like I am. So what is there to fear?

-Yuuki's P.O.V.-

He lets out a soft sigh, and when he looks up at me, his eyes are inexplicably warm. I merely blink uncomprehendingly to him.

"Yuuki...You asked what I would do with you..." He trails off, his stare boring into my mind as he thinks.

He always did have this odd stare of his, when he was really thinking hard about something, he wouldn't look away. He would look you dead on in the eyes, as if he was wrenching out your soul and picking it apart piece by piece to see what would be most preferable for him to say.

"I want to kill you. I want to banish every thought of you that I've ever had from my mind so that I never have to lose myself to you."

I don't offer any sort of reply, so he continues

"I want to love you. I want to hold you. I want to touch your face, your warm human face. Not this despicable monster that you've become. This satanic beast that desires the blood of others. Demonic. That's what we are Yuuki. We'd better hope that there's no such thing as a hell, or a God, or a heaven, or an afterlife of any kind."

It takes me a moment to comprehend what these trails of ice flooding down my cheeks are. Saltwater trickles that itch and tremble along the curves of my face only to capture themselves on the tip of frown. But, before I can swipe them away vigorously, Zero takes a step towards me, so that we're pressed tentatively together, and brushes his finger underneath the hollow of my eye across to the side of my face, trapping the tears to my cheekbone.

We stand there for a moment, just breathing and staring at each other. His hand is cupping the side of my face ever so gently, and I can't help but tilt my head into it and continue to stare into his rounded, oddly thickly lashed, and amethyst eyes.

"But...I also want to kiss you. I want to touch and and to hold you and protect you from all the other evils in the world." His lips flicker to an almost smile, as close as Zero ever gets.

After a moment's hesitation, I ask "can I...?"

He looks amused. "Can you what?" Teasingly. Lightly. He knows exactly what I'm asking...

I huff out an embarrassed breath straight from my diaphragm, and then clarify, making sure to shift my gaze to the beige cement sidewalk beneath our feet(2).

"Can I drink you're blood?" My face is florid and I can't bare to look at him. He snorts out a soft laugh and whispers a soft "Yes" in my ear and tilts his head to the side to expose his neck.

My breath stops short for a moment, but it comes back as I curl my left arm around his body and push my fingers into the roots of his silver hair. I press my right hand to his chest and slide it up to dip my fingers into the grooves of his collarbone.

And then my lips connect to the soft tissue of his throat. Before I bite, I can feel his pulsating heartbeat ticking against my lips. And the smell. It's intoxicating and I don't even realize I've sank in my teeth until I can taste.

The taste. I suckle gently and the liquid splashes against my throat, coating it with a thick, sensory, and warm milk-like substance. It tastes like passion. It tastes like love. It tastes like desire. It tastes like the glowing warmth that hits you when you open an oven door. It tastes like Zero.

I let out a soft a groan and suck harder. The sound of his soft moan and the slight sound of his lips parting as he pushes the breath out of my lungs sends a white-hot searing feeling through me.

"Yuuki." A terrifying familiar voice calls out from behind me. Kaname.

(1)-Now if that isn't cliched...I don't know what is. Jesus.

(2)- Do they even have cement sidewalks? I don't even remember... I haven't seen the show or read to manga in so long, sorry if any of the characterization is off. They're just so overtly angsty, it's a little hard to write sometimes.


	6. Kaname, the poor little thing

Oops 4 months since I uploaded this. I know, I'm a terrible person. The problem is that I'm not really in this fandom so much anymore. But I want to finish the story. Dammit. I'm trying, I really am, but I have no ideas and I'm a loser and I need to finish this goddamn story. Which is why I don't intend on it being too long. I'm truly very sorry. I was just thinking today how much I hate when authors don't update their stories often and leave months between each update. Then I realized I'm the biggest hypocrite the world has ever known, and I read over my latest chapter and decided to continue writing. I'm really really really sorry. Feel free to kick my ass in the comments, I know I deserve. I DO plan on finishing this though, it might take a while though. But I'll finish it if it's the death of me.

-Still Yuuki's P.O.V.-

"Yuuki." A terrifying familiar voice calls out from behind me. Kaname.

"K-Kaname..." I gasp slowing backing off from Zero, just a bit. He wraps one of his arms possesively around my waist. His eyes are glinting, and a smirk adornes his face. It says that he's won. It says that I'm his.

I'm no ones. Or so I wish. But I know that I'm his. I've always been his. Always cared for him and wanted to just do anything, **anything**, to get him to pay attention. To not hide himself from me. All I ever wanted was for him to talk to me, maybe even let me in on a smile. Now, I just want to lay with him forever and spill out his every secret like the blood that flows through his veins. I want to **taste** it.

I step forward.

"Kaname...I'm sorry. I care for you, I really do. I've always looked up to you and I don't want to lose you. I don't want to do this to you...But I need him. Kaname." I look at him pleadingly. Those rich auburn eyes stare back at me and I can see everything. The pain I've been putting him through.

"..." Nothing. Just him staring at me, and what he says next squeezes me so tight with guilt I can barely breathe.  
"Remember what I said?" _"Yuuki...if you ever leave me...I will die." _Zero's holding onto me tight, fingers digging into my skin slightly. He tilts his head onto mine a bit, just resting it as he stares at Kaname. The anger and triumph is gone now. He seems almost sad, but not quite. More solemn than anything else, understanding.

"Yuuki," he murmered, letting out a small sigh, "let me talk to Kaname." He unwrapped his arms and stood beside me, gripping my shoulders and gentely twisting my body to face him so he could look into my eyes.

I became alarmed. "No! Zero! I'm not going to let you fight! This is ridiculous! Don't-" I started to plead, stepping between him and Kaname. Zero only sighs.

"I'm not going to hurt him, I just want to talk." He stares at me. I slowly nod. Even with everything I've done to Zero, he's always been there for me. I have to try my best to trust him. After giving him a look that was both stern and nervous, I run off into the school to try to find Yori. I haven't seen her in so long. I've really missed her.

-Zero's P.O.V.-

"What do you want?" He questions, always so calm and collected, never revealing his true anger.

"I know exactly how you feel, I've been living it for the past year Kaname." I pause for a moment, wanting to let it sink in. "She loves you too you know. Not quite in the same way. But it's there."

"I know that, I don't need a child to tell me things I already know." He glares slightly, but doesn't attack me like I know he must be dying to.

I let out a sigh, this is going to be more difficult than I thought. "I don't know what you said to her before, but judging by the look on her face I'm betting you threatened to kill yourself if she doesn't stay with you?" I stare at him intently. He doesn't reply, and I take that as a yes.  
"Don't. She already blames herself enough for everything, she won't be able to get over your death."

"I've lived for her for so long, and I'm afraid I can't spend my life pining for someone who doesn't want me." He stares coldly at me. "Don't tell me what not to do."

And there's nothing I can say to change his mind, not even for Yuuki, because if there was ever only thing I know about life, it's this: Life without Yuuki is damn near impossible.

I know this update isn't very long, but i wanted to put something up here just so you know I haven't abandoned this. I hope it isn't too horrible. I'm not sure how to end this, but that's my problem, not yours. So I'm really sorry, hopefully I'll update this at least within the next month.


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